So Today is July 18th. 2025

In 2013, at around 1:16 in the morning you both asked Jesus into your hearts in your bedroom at the double rainbow. It was a wonderful and emotional moment that I am so thankful that I got the opportunity to share with you both. You may not remember details, but I do…I am going to put them in here now, so if anything were to happen before you talk to me again you will at least have this story to keep in your hearts.

We had been at Bible School that week at Bethel. Pastor Ron did a very good job of explaining the process, he wasn’t the type of person who scared children with Hell or painted pictures of magical things in Heaven. He explained process and also let you know where you were as lost people. I had been praying every summer for while that you would ask Jesus into your hearts. I knew if that happened, then nothing this world could throw at you would hurt you. Your eternal souls would be safe. Every year you got older I worried more about other factors keeping you from taking this most important step. This night didn’t seem any different than others we had experienced together in Bible School. We came home, you got your showers we got ready for bed.

That night we did our evening prayer like we tried to do every night, and things seemed normal, but it was on your mind. The Holy Spirit was working with you, a little after midnight you woke me up and were crying, you both were trying to make sense of how you were feeling and what you needed to do. You explained to me that you wanted to be saved, but you were also afraid your mother would be upset with you. She had told you that none of that applied to you because you had been “baptized” catholic years ago so you didn’t need any of this stuff. That was what your articulated to me, I’m sure much more about this topic was said with her over the years, because you were so easily upset when we talked about things like this. So we talked about choice and the bible and how being baptized as a child before you understood what was going on was different than choosing to ask Jesus into your heart to be your personal savior. I didn’t push, because I knew if you were manipulated into doing this or just did it because you were scared, it wouldn’t really “count” God doesn’t want you guilted or pushed towards Him, He desires you to love and choose Him. That can’t be faked or pushed. It has to be something that comes from your Heart. Finally you understood, you considered it and you both wanted to pray the prayer. As my little girls prayed that prayer and your faith journey began I was so happy. The thing I worried more about in this world than any other, was your mother confusing you or scaring you to the point that you wouldn’t accept Jesus as your Personal Savior (something she had the luxury to do herself but was denying you). Such a tremendous weight was lifted off of my shoulders as I knew in my heart, my children were safe. No matter what happened to you or me after that, I would see you again in heaven and get to spend eternity making up for all the lost time we had. I have never been happier. It still took years for you to get up the courage and choose to be baptized. Again, I feel like your fear was being cultivated by someone who didn’t like the idea of you making your own choices. I count myself blessed that I got to watch that and be a part of it as well. If you never speak to me again, the facts that you asked Jesus into your heart and followed Him in baptism gives me peace. Many people see their children every day and don’t have that comfort. I am blessed despite our present circumstances.

This time away from you has been difficult. I have felt lots of different emotions and still feel like this is such a waste of time for us and so not fair that things are as they are. But the one thing that hasn’t changed is my thankfulness to God that He has placed the Holy Spirit in your heart to Guide and Direct you as you navigate your life however you choose to do that. I don’t understand why you are still there. I don’t understand why you choose to believe lies instead of embracing the truth which is pretty clear. I don’t get why you don’t feel like you can talk to me. You’ve always been able to talk to me. I miss you. Every day. Your grandparents miss you every day. We are all living our lives as best we can, but a big part of mine is missing. No one on this Earth cherishes you the way I do. You are missing out on that. I feel bad for you because of it. We used this day to celebrate your birthday on the farm because I never saw you on your real one. I am still, very thankful you asked Jesus into your heart on this day all those years ago. I am thankful you eventually became brave enough to follow the Bible and choose to be baptized. I have faith that these things will keep you despite our distance. I love you with all of my heart. That will never change. Happy Jesus Birthday my girls. I hope you have a great day. I am here, waiting. Please don’t wait any longer. Just reach out. There’s nothing we can’t figure out together.